I believe it is time for us to make a significant change, and that change needs to start now. We cannot continue the way we are if we want to be successful as a global community.
It is imperative that all people begin naming their children the way Papa Smurf did. When a little smurf came to life he waited until the little guy showed some personality, then he named him. Brainy was intelligent, Hefty was strong, and Scardy is afraid of everything. In the smurf society everyone knew their place, and the place of the other smurfs. Think of all the societal problems that could be solved if we named our children that way.
When you are out at a social gathering and you start talking to someone, you would know right off the bat what kind of conversation you were going to have, and if you wanted to proceed. You wouldn't waste your day away trying to have an intelligent conversation with someone named 'Clueless', or 'Closed-Minded'. If you wanted to just have a casual chat that would lead to laughs, 'Jokey' or 'Shallow' might be a perfect fit for you. What a great solution this would be to awkward social settings, if we just knew who we were talking to right from the get go.
Have you ever sought out good advice from the wrong person? That would be a problem of the past. Nobody would look for parenting advice from 'Heading-for-prison' or 'Bully' they would be much more likely to seek out 'Patience' or perhaps 'Kind.' Unfortunately, today, we are surrounded by people who want to be experts on everything and insist they know more than they do. Let's make life easier for everyone by just giving people appropriate names.
I picture a job interview being much easier:
"Hello, Mr. Micro-Manager. Am I pronuncing your name correctly?"
"Yup, you got it perfect."
"Well I don't think this interview is necessary, I'm pretty sure you are not the man to lead this project. Thank you for your time."
History would be very different if the people of Nazi Germany knew they were not following Hitler, but instead they had chosen to get behind, 'Insane Racist.' I think of American Presidents of the past and feel they might have been better named, 'Unfaithful', 'Crook', 'Dishonest', or 'Village Idiot'. (I'll let you fill in the blanks there) Would you have put your financial trust in 'Rips-off-Employees' or 'Bankrupts Often'? I don't think so. Our world would be a better place if we would have learned from the wisdom of that red-hat-wearing smurf.
I think you will agree that we need to enact the world-wide naming conventions act immediately! Every child born must wait until the age of 10 and be given a name that suits his/her personality. This is not just a personal preference to help me know who I'm dealing with when I begin a conversation, it is for the good of all men! We must unite and act as one for a better future for all.