It's sorta scary that our country will one day be run by people who think skinny jeans are a good idea.
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I'm a bit of a weird teacher, so sometimes my students look at me like I'm crazy and ask, "Are you sure about that?"
To which I reply. "I am three. I might be odd, but I'm positive." There is no situation so bad, so terrible, so disgusting... that dabbing can't make it worse.
So I'm trying a new diet and the other day a friend said,
"I can't believe you've gotten so big in just six months." It's not as bad as it sounds because she was talking to my daughter who really is sprouting. I thought about a couple of other things you could say, but just not to everyone. "I'm going to beat you!" When I play checkers with my son. "I'm not speaking to you for the rest of the year!" When said on December 31st at 11:59. "You've got a really nice ass." When spoken to a person who raises donkeys. You know the remote control was invented by a man because women have had them ever since the television was invented. It was just called something a little different... a Husband.
Honey, I can't hear it. Can you turn it up a bit? I don't like this, let's switch channels? It's a bit fuzzy, the antenna needs to move just slightly to the left. Sometimes when I see a website that asks me to 'sign on' instead of 'sign in' my mind goes all Beatles.
Sign on you crazy diamond What's the best way to deal with a lying bully who is throwing a tantrum?
We can't put him in the corner, his office is an oval. If this joke upsets you, just pretend I wrote it in December. |
From the Mind of BuffingtonThis is a section that just has random silly thoughts that come to me from time to time. It is not meant to be taken seriously. Archives
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